Sunday, January 15, 2012

Duck, Duck, Coyote

I really thought that I had run out of tears this week. My face has ached from it actually and I thought I was done... but Mother Nature had another idea.



It was actually a wonderful morning. Our first snowfall of the winter had come in the night and the world was a calm and quiet that only a winter white day can bring. The girls actually couldn't wait to get outside and before I knew it they were bundled up in their pjs, rain boots and a miss matched collection of hats, mittens and layers of coats. There was no stopping them. It was actually pretty comical. Hubby FINALLY had a day off and we were enjoying a cup of hot coffee on the porch while the girls played. Not long after, the girls and I went in to warm up and make more coffee while Daddy stayed outside. I saw him out of the corner of my eye as he walked in the direction of our duck pen.... I saw him looking around and then I realized that Max was no where to be seen....he had to just be inside out of the snow right? I knew that something was up....

I won't go into details but things were not alright, and Max is no longer with us. There was no being strong in front of the girls this time, and it literally felt like my heart was breaking even before I had to tell them the bad news.  I had seen a coyote earlier in the day, so I made sure to keep Max penned up. I thought that would keep him safe but it just wasn't enough...

What I want to know is how... not how this creature took the life of our much loved pet.... there is no going back on that now, but rather, how do you move on from this? How do you deal with the loss that comes from living in the country and having animals. Is it something that you just have to get used to? Is that really even possible? I don't want to be so hardened to life that I don't love animals or that I just don't care at all but I do have to wonder if I am cut out for this. I so want to be more self reliant and live off the land but at the same time I just don't know how to manage the heart ache....

2 comments:

Robin said...

What you do, if you were me, is learn from it. Fortify the coop. I had read that raccoons, and prob coyotes too since I've never heard/seen just one, can gang up on critters in pens. And, in the case of the raccoons, they will have some of the gang on one side making the penned critters go to the other side where there are a few other waiting raccoons... and if the fencing is large enough for them to reach their little hands into... yeh. Not pretty. I want chickens really badly but since we also have a bunch of the bandit-faced critters here {and I don't wish them harm}, as well as coyotes, that come to drink from the pond, I just can't do it right now. Maybe when we move closer to town and our place isn't so wooded... Fortify your fencing b/c predators will return. :( So sorry! We had 2 ducks we got w/ the house - they'd been here for *years*... then about 2 years into our living here - there was only 1 and it went down hill from there {we weren't bringing them in at night tho'... they were sup to go on the pond for safety as I assumed they had all those years}. First time I'd had ducks and, tho' our Max, Kiefer, & Yeager weren't hug friendly, I missed them terribly. Still do. You won't harden to loosing animals; it's not in your nature or mine. You just have to decide if it's worth it, and if it is to do the best you can. Hugs my dear friend!

Tammy said...

So sorry for your loss. :(