Friday, January 30, 2009

A moment of calm

I know you'll all be wondering and for the time being I am having a moment of calm and optimism...

I got a phone call last night from the owner of Remi (Ragamuffin) asking if he could come get her. It seems he had asked his sister (our neighbor) to come and get her a week and a half or so ago and he just found out last night that she hadn't. He went on to apologize and offer us a puppy for free if she has one. He explained that his family has been in housing limbo while his son has been in the hospital. The little boy was born with only half a heart so they have been in Ft Worth with him...he seemed genuinely sorry for us having her this long and was nice enough to let us keep her until this evening. Jason wasn't home last night, he had class, and I wanted him to be here for the girls sake (and mine)so he's coming this evening to get her. I still feel numb/sick and it was so hard to explain it to Janie. It's funny tho, while I was talking to her and trying to explain that we did a good thing taking care of her when she needed it and that sometimes we have to do things just because they are right and not because we are going to get anything out of it- giving her the pep talk I was giving myself one too.

Let night I was not in the frame of mind to look on the bright side, or to have faith that this all happened for a reason, I just needed to sulk and cry. Jason came home and I had to go over it all with him too and we talked it all out and all the reasons that this happened to us and to her. This morning I am feeling a little bit better about it and I'm trying to keep the faith that God knows why this happened and that it's always easy to have faith when things are going good. I am trying very hard to have faith when I don't understand why. God always knows the bigger picture and his plans for us are always bigger and greater than anything we can imagine....I kind of think that maybe we had to love her so we could be open to another little dog that needs us. I would have never even looked let alone considered a little dog. To be honest I wasn't even looking at anything that wasn't a yellow lab. I have felt this void and empty spot in our house since Koda's passing and I couldn't see that maybe that empty spot could be filled by someone smaller...Maybe God knows there is a dog out there that will need us and we would have missed out on it because I had blinders on. Or maybe, this is one of those things that just happens and we have to take it at face value- we had three great weeks with a loving dog that needed love...

2 comments:

suzanne said...

Hello Hallie

This experience must be so confusing for you. I am so sorry she has to go. I hope they have a change of heart and bring her back.

Warm regards
Suzanne

Heidi's Blog said...

Well Darn. She was lucky to have been in your home the past few weeks. Im sure you have made an impression on her just as she has on you.